Thursday, July 7, 2016

Now Hiring: Dishwasher


Woman of the House seeks Dishwasher: No experience necessary. Must be willing to stand in position for 20-30 minute increments. Required to hand wash pots/pans and non-dishwasher safe items. Able to load, run, empty dishwasher in a timely manner. Do not be alarmed or discouraged when more dishes, glasses, silverware suddenly appear after you have completed the above cycle; this is normal. Also fill soap dispensers, wash/dry/store hand towels, wipe down table and counters. This position will last for the rest of your life until the end of time.

Salary: $50,000. Can start anytime.

Disclaimer: This is a joke, I can't hire someone to wash dishes. I wish I could but I can not. Just day-dreaming.

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